Silver Lining

A loving community finding the silver lining.

Category Archives: Kindness

Anti-Bullying Awareness Day!

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Happy Anti-Bullying Awareness Day!

We know that this was actually yesterday but we shouldn’t restrict ourselves because of that. Although many of us here at Lynbrook don’t think about bullying, as we don’t encounter it very often, it’s still a huge dilemma in many schools across the country. It’s important for us to recognize that bullying does not only mean physical harassment.

A general definition of bullying would be forcing people to do things they are not willing to. We know that there is immense peer pressure that exists at our campus. Although it may not stand out as bullying, whenever we judge what others wear or do or force our friends to join a club with us, that is in fact bullying. A great way to fight against this is to change our everyday behavior in very minor actions.

Instead of telling someone their outfit sucks, don’t comment anything if you don’t like it. Everyone has their own style and taste. Instead of forcing your friend to accompany you to a club meeting, ask them if they would like to join. Give them a chance to decide, don’t be the one taking decisions on their behalf. Little changes like these can help make a big difference if everyone follows through!

One pressure I feel at school is with grades. Whenever I get a quiz or test back, most of my friends come to me to compare grades. Sometimes, I don’t do as well as I had hoped and I prefer not to share my grades, but the atmosphere of the class makes it really hard not to. People peak over my shoulder and try to glance at my paper. At this point, I kind of give up and share my grades, but not whole-heartedly. I am sure people don’t realize that they are doing this and it sometimes hurts others, but it’s about time everyone does. It’s time to speak out and express our true feelings about these pressures!

Peer pressure is a very subtle form of bullying and sometimes very hard for us to even tell that we are pressuring someone. The best way to stop ourselves from peer pressuring is to put ourselves in the other person’s show. Always remember one thing, “Be sure to taste your words before you spit them.” – BullyVille.com

-Love Panda

Change the world…

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“One child, one teacher, one book, one pen can change the world.”

― Malala Yousafzai

 

It’s easy for people to take their education for granted, especially American children who are granted free education. Books, essays, tests… What could be even a little appealing about learning? Though the school year may be busier than summer vacation, it only hurts us to look at school as a prison or punishment. Rather, as Malala believes, education is power.

 

“One child, one teacher, one book, one pen can change the world,” she says. And it makes sense. Education gives people the power to make their own well-informed decisions, and it allows us greater freedom and confidence in knowing how things work. Education further prepares us to go into the adult world with an open mind. Imagine, you are exposed to all the knowledge in the world, and all you need to soak it in is your books and your brain.

 

There is a lot to envy about summer, but turn your school year into something meaningful.

“Never judge someone without knowing the whole story. You may think you understand, but you don’t.”

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“Never judge someone without knowing the whole story. You may think you understand, but you don’t.” -Anonymous

You don’t know me and I don’t know you. That is the unfortunate truth. And as much as I would love to get to know each and every one of you (I really would!!), we will never truly know a person’s full story. Even if we do, we may not know the whole thing. Not only is it important to respect a person’s privacy, but we should not judge them if they decide not to share their story.

For me, these cases have never truly hit home. I do, however, know people who chose to judge others based on appearances or what they first believe. It’s not that they want to be mean or insulting to someone, it just comes out of their mouth, sometimes on accident. Situations like those make me uncomfortable. I know the importance of seeing the good in people, and I always try my best to do that. I give people second or third chances because everyone deserves that. We don’t know a person’s full story, so it isn’t fair that we judge them on what little we do know.

In those cases where we do know what is going on, it still is important not to judge. Someone may be going through a rough time, and the last thing he or she needs are judgmental stares. My friends always know when I’m having a bad day. They may not ask me why, but they do not judge me because of how I behave around them. Instead they give me a warm hug, which is definitely something that is always needed in a person’s life. (Besides, who doesn’t like a hug from their friends?). We should be there for others as a kind friend, not as a judgmental peer.

Tips on how to be accepting of yourself and others

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  1. Don’t be afraid to be yourself: people will love you no matter what
  2. Everyone is still trying to find out who they truly are: This is the time in our lives to figure out who we are. We cannot do that if we are constantly afraid of what others think of us.
  3. It is important to know when to stop: There is a fine line between making a joke and actually hurting someone. Unfortunately, it is hard to tell when you have crossed that line. Be careful of what you say and to whom you say it to.
  4. Understand the importance of being kind: Sometimes, when someone is having a rough day, it can help to be there for that person with a kind heart.  

Don’t let them get to you!!: The more we listen to what people start to say about us, the more we believe them, even if what they have to say is not necessarily something good. Keep in mind the kindness you have within you, and don’t ever lose it!  

Don’t judge

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“Judging a person does not define who they are…it defines who you are” –Anonymous

I have always been careful when it comes to my opinions. I know that what I say, no matter how innocent I may perceive it to be, can affect a person. I know this because I have been on the receiving end of judgmental looks numerous times. It does not have to be solely based on my outfit or how I look, but also who I am on the inside. I have a very extravagant personality–or I like to believe so–and I understand that that can sometimes set people off. Because of how they treat me or look at me due to this, I change who I am to appear to whatever pleases them. This isn’t right, though.

By judging me, you are not giving me “character” or “helping me find myself,” you are actually determining who you are. You are not giving me a fair chance to prove myself to this world. Instead, you are simply hurting yourself by showcasing what kind of a person you can be.

“A Fateful Encounter”

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As I was walking to work one morning, I came across a man sitting on the concrete ground, his back leaning against the wall. He appeared to be sleeping, but only someone with an eye for perception could tell that he was very much awake. A small cardboard sign lay at his side with the words, “Will work for food” written across it. Hoping he would not notice me or attempt to ask for money, I pretended to be intrigued with the blank screen of my smart phone, walking straight past him. Later that evening, as I stopped for dinner, I noticed the same man sitting across the street. Once again, he appeared motionless, with the small make-shift sign placed next to him. Confused, I approached the man.

“Are you following me?”

No answer.

I looked around, uncertain of what to do. In all my years of living in this city, I have never been in a situation such as this. I was tempted to walk away, ignore the man, and continue to live my life as I normally do, but there was something that resisted me from doing so.

“Here,” I said, reaching into my pocket and handing him a $10 bill.

Again, the man said nothing, nor did he take the money from my hand. He looked up and I got a clear glimpse of his face. His eyes were puffy and red, his skin cracked from the bitter cold. He had a large mat of hair that covered most of his face. I looked straight into his eyes; what once must have been a bright, clear blue was now replaced by a murky, dull grey.

“Here,” I repeated. “Take it.”

“I do not want your money.” His voice took me off guard. It was low and serious, with a twinge of exhaustion. He pointed to the sign. “I will work. I want to earn it.”

“I’m sorry. I can’t help you there.” And I turned back to my apartment. But before I knew what I was doing, I found myself standing in front of the man, gazing over him once more. There was something about him. In his eyes. The passion, the need to do good. Despite the dirty looks shot at him every day, this man is not what others make him out to be. I took a deep breath. “We’re hiring some busboys at my restaurant. Be at this address tomorrow morning, 8 A.M.” I smiled. “Don’t be late on your first day.”

That man is now considered to be one of the finest chefs in America. All because someone did not judge him for what he appeared to be.

Do something kind for your friends!

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Do something kind for your friends!!– Being there for your friends is probably one of the best things you could ever do for them. Doing something kind for them can consist of just being there for them.

To become closer friends, be open with each other.

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To become closer friends, be open with each other.

Earlier this week, I talked about how I was afraid to tell my friends personal secrets because of how vulnerable I feel after that, since friendships rarely last forever. Well, today I’m going to continue with the story of that friend that I told my problems to.

Initially, I regretted telling her, because at that time, I’d only known her for a little under a year, and we didn’t see each other or talk that much. I felt like I was sharing too much of my problems even though we weren’t that close, and I was worried that I was just burdening her with my problems. But she never complained about it, and only thought of making me feel better. I still felt guilty, but telling her about what happened with me and my friends only made me realize how desperate I was to talk to someone about it, so I found that I couldn’t even stop myself. I felt so vulnerable and weak in front of her, so for a while after that, I was really nervous talking to her (she acted normal after though).

I stopped feeling bad when she told me about how worried she was for her future because she wanted to do so many things but at the same time, she wasn’t sure of anything. I realized that wanted to help her feel better, not because she helped me once (though it was part of the reason), but because it hurt to see her upset. I tried my hardest to let her know that she would be okay, and help her get her mind off her worries. I don’t know how much I actually helped, but she said that she felt a lot better after talking to me.

After that time, I started relying on her more. Trusting her more with what I couldn’t tell even my closest friends, and she told me her worries too. We opened up to each other, and it led to us understanding each other more. Because of that, we were able to become closer as friends. Today, I think of her as one of my best friends, and I don’t regret telling her about my problem back then, because now I found a real friend.

Changing the world Starts with YOU!

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Isn’t it weird that as create technology to bring us closer we are actually more disconnected from the people close to us? Or as we are able to meet more kinds of people… the more we judge them? I am not saying this is true for everyone but I am not gonna lie that I have done so sometimes.

Sometimes people struggle to start a conversation just with another human but that is the most important part. Communication is very important especially face to face. Making connections and being human is what is important. We all should try not to be so influenced by technology… we should use it to our advantage not let it consume us.

This is an amazing thought provoking video talking about this “paradox of our generation” that comes with the use of technology. Jay Shetty explains his point of view very well. Even if you agree with it or not, I hope you can watch this video 🙂

Hope you have an amazing week ahead!

 

There are no strangers here, only friends you haven’t yet met

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There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met. William Butler Yeats
Back when I was in kindergarten, I was so shy to the point that I would hide myself in the bathroom just so I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone. The girls in my class had already been friends since preschool so I was an outsider to them. To me, they were an unknown territory, like aliens.
After struggling with half a year of solitude, I eventually found myself paying more and more attention to another girl in the class. She seemed to stand out from the crowd but was able to become friends with that tight group. One day, after my mom told me about how important friends are, I approached the girl and asked her to teach me how to play with dolls. I noticed that the group enjoyed collecting dolls and sharing them during break so I thought that that would be an appropriate way to introduce myself to at least one of them.
To my surprise, she became extremely excited (it freaked me out a little at first) and literally dragged me into their little “social corner.” Although the rest of the girls were fairly pleasant, she was my first best friend and to this day, I still keep in contact with her. We are no longer that close, but since that day, I’ve felt more comfortable around people I didn’t know. Looking back, I believe that if I hadn’t approached them, I would never have gotten over my shyness that early.
They taught me that to become friends with someone is to approach a stranger and build the relationship over time. It might seem scary at first but try opening up to a few people you have never met before. They may be strangers now, but who knows? Maybe in just a few months or years, they will be your best friends. The first step is saying Hi.