Silver Lining

A loving community finding the silver lining.

Monthly Archives: May 2016

“Some memories are unforgettable, remaining ever vivid and heartwarming!”

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“Some memories are unforgettable, remaining ever vivid and heartwarming!” – Joseph B. Wirthlin

Back in elementary school, I was part of a group of friends that really enjoyed to play “pretend” and it was quite complicated. Everyday at recess, we would take turns playing different roles in what we called “the family.”

My most common role was a cat. My job was to stay in the house and watch over the “playful” dogs as the other people when out to the field to collect supplies, or grass. Even though it did get a bit boring just watching on a pole, I enjoyed it because I felt connected and included. A few months later, I moved and was forced to break away from the family I had at school.

Looking back, I feel like the game with a bit childish but it made me understand what it felt like to have people incorporate you and pay attention to you, something that I wasn’t very knowledgeable of. It was these memories that made me truly understand friendship and I still wish I could relive them every single day.

One time in my new school, I tried to reenact the scene with my friends. Although it was in completely different settings and different people, I felt like I was able to share some of my past with them. Yes, it was a bit awkward but we bonded closer as a group because of this. I’m really happy to have been able to revisit some of my favorite memories.

Challenge: Do something from the past

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Challenge: Do something that you used to do when you and your friends were kids.


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Anorexia

Definition: An eating disorder characterized by abnormally low body weight, fear of gaining weight, and a distorted perception of body weight

 

Symptoms

  • Physical
    • Extreme weight loss
    • Abnormal blood counts
    • Fatigue/Insomnia
    • Low blood pressure
    • Swelling of arms or legs
  • Emotional/behavioral
    • Severely restricting food intake – dieting, fasting
    • Self-induced vomiting to get rid of the food
    • Fear of gaining weight
    • Social withdrawal
    • Refusal to eat

 

Statistics

  • Anorexia is common: there are more than 200,000 cases in the US alone every year.
  • Between 90 and 95 percent of people with anorexia are women and girls, and the condition usually arises in the early-mid teen years.

 

How to Feel Better

  • Once anorexia becomes severe, it can take over someone’s life. Make sure to talk to a doctor or someone you trust, because there are so many people out there willing to help you.
  • Remember that thinness ≠ self-worth
  • Take appropriate vitamin and mineral supplements – potassium and zinc are particularly helpful for making you feel better.
  • Don’t isolate yourself from your parents, friends, or people who care about you.
  • Resist the urge to weigh yourself! You’re beautiful the way you are.

 

Sources

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anorexia/home/ovc-20179508

https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/anorexia-nervosa

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anorexia/symptoms-causes/dxc-20179513

http://www.caringonline.com/supplements-for-eating-disorder-recovery/

Reflection

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If you’ve completed the challenge, let us know how it went! Have you been able to rekindle your relationship with an old friend, or get closer to a new one? Any feedback is appreciated 🙂

A Golden Chain

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A Golden Chain – by Helen Steiner Rice

Friendship is a Golden Chain,

The links are friends so dear,

And like a rare and precious jewel

It’s treasured more each year…

 

It’s clasped together firmly

With a love that’s deep and true,

And it’s rich with happy memories

and fond recollections, too…

 

Time can’t destroy its beauty

For, as long as memory lives,

Years can’t erase the pleasure

That the joy of friendship gives…

 

For friendship is a priceless gift

That can’t be bought or sold,

But to have an understanding friend

Is worth far more than gold…

 

And the Golden Chain of Friendship

Is a strong and blessed tie

Binding kindred hearts together

As the years go passing by.

Letting go is perfectly fine

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I once was in a very unhealthy relationship. It was one of those friendships that just seemed all pretty and nice on the surface, but in truth was in turmoil underneath. When I first met her, I thought she was amazing. She was nice, very outgoing and down-to-earth, and seemed like she would be fun to hang out with. So me being new to the school, I decided that I could be friends with her.

As time went by, however, things didn’t work out as I thought they would. She would get angry at the tiniest things, and if I made a mistake she would hold grudges forever. Other times, she would ditch me and hang out with other people when we had already made plans. Although she acted nice on the surface, and around others, she completely ignored me other times. I felt dismayed, and that she had betrayed our relationship.

We soon broke ties with each other, and I’m honestly so glad that happened. I thought that I would have to endure being friends, but in truth neither of us liked the fake relationship in the first place. I’m sure she’s truly a nice person, but we had differing intentions and personalities which were just not compatible. Now, I feel so much more better that we have gone our separate ways and moved on with our lives.

So if you’re feeling stressed out about any friendships in your life, don’t be afraid to let go. In the end, things will work out. You shouldn’t have to hang on to the negative things in your life at all, no matter who you are.

How to Maintain a Healthy Friendship

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How to maintain a friendship

  1. Show your appreciation
  2. Speak with each other often
  3. Have fun together!!
  4. Build mutual trust
  5. Handle conflicts maturely and appropriately

Friendship comes naturally!

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Friendship comes naturally

Today, I would like to share someone else’s story with you, rather than mine. It’s about a girl in my school. I never really knew her well, since she’s a sophomore and I’m a junior. However, when I heard her speech while she was running to be a part of student council, her message really hit home for me.

She talked about the way she was new to this area in middle school, and how it was hard for her to make friends. She used to be so unconfident in herself and her abilities, and she would constantly feel lonely because she was so new and didn’t make any friends right away. However, as time went on she met a few people, and she’s now proud to call them her best friends. Those friends helped her become more involved, and it was because she took the effort to talk to people and get to know them better, that people reciprocated her feelings. These friends gave her courage, the courage to speak out and voice her opinion. They gave her the emotional support that she needed to be able to stand up in front of the whole school that day and run for an officer position, when just a few years ago she used to be shy and reserved. When hearing her speech, I felt like I could connect to her on so many levels, and I’m sure many other people would as well.

If you’re having a hard time making friends, don’t stress over it too much. Real friendships will come naturally. And if you feel like you aren’t close to someone, take the time to talk to them more and get to know them better, because friends can change your life in positive ways you can’t even imagine.

Challenge: Get to know a friend better!

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Challenge: Get to know a friend better

This can be someone you have just met recently, or an old friend that you never got close to. This can even be a family member.

Social Anxiety

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Definition: a chronic condition in which the individual finds social interactions so difficult that he or she avoids them completely.

Symptoms:

  • Emotional/behavioral
    • Fear of being judged
    • Worrying about embarrassment
    • Concern in offending someone
    • Avoiding doing thing/speaking to people out of fear of embarrassment  
  • Physical
    • Fast heartbeat
    • Trouble catching your breath
    • Muscle tension
    • Confusion or feeling out of body
  • Avoiding normal social situations (hard to endure)
    • Using a public restroom
    • Making eye contact
    • Attending parties or social gatherings
    • Initiating conversation


Statistics:

  • Social anxiety is fairly common: there are more than 200,000 new cases in the US every year.
  • The most common age group for social anxiety is wide, ranging from elementary school children to senior citizens. Very young children are rarely affected.

How to feel Better:

  • Don’t be afraid to get help! 36% of people with social anxiety symptoms don’t seek help until 10 or more years later. Social Anxiety can be treated, and many people find professional help beneficial.
  • Relaxation Exercises: Take deep breaths or meditate
  • Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT): CBT has been very successful. It guides a person’s thoughts more in a more rational direction, and helps them stop avoiding situations that cause anxiety.
  • Join a group: Anxiety is an unpleasant feeling, but no one has to go through it alone. Join a support group to meet new people and get through it together with them.
  • Medication: Medication can be used to treat social anxiety and minimize the physical symptoms like shaking or a rapid heartbeat.

Sources:

http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/mental-health-social-anxiety-disorder?page=3

http://www.adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/social-anxiety-disorder

http://socialphobia.org/social-anxiety-symptoms-and-treatment

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/social-anxiety-disorder/basics/symptoms/con-20032524